Meeting Mr. Right
Moving forward, how am I supposed to meet “the one?” Before I could even go about wondering the answer to this question, I was given so many recommendations from friends.
The first recommendation was online apps. There are so many online dating apps. There’s Bumble, eHarmony, Plenty of Fish, Tinder, BLK, Coffee Meets Bagel, Inner Circle, The League, and so many more. They each seem to have carved out a niche for themselves. For example, Bumble won’t allow men to initiate conversation, women have to. Similarly, BLK is for black women and men. The League is supposed to be for the well educated and professional. See, there’s no shortage of apps to choose from. At various times, over the past 3 years, I’ve installed each of these apps. I scroll through all the available candidates. Unlike in person, on the app, I’m able to really analyze a potential candidate. I can evaluate their appearance, their grammar, the photos they choose to put, the words they choose to write, etc. Perhaps that’s the good part. But for me, I always tend to find something wrong - something I wouldn’t notice until I had gotten to know and like the man if we had met conventionally. So I’m not sure dating apps are for me. Literally, I never end up swiping.
The second recommendation was to go out by myself. Now immediately, this seems completely contrary to everything single women are taught. We’re not supposed to go anywhere alone because men are crazy! I may never return home and you wouldn’t know what happened! Ok. Now that I’ve indulged my Criminal Mind’s imagination, I didn’t mind this idea. Prior to COVID-19, I did start taking myself to lunch after church on the weekends I didn’t have my daughter. I’d pick a restaurant, sit at the bar, and simply enjoy the alone time. Sometimes men would befriend me. Sometimes they wouldn’t. Sometimes there were no single men there. Regardless, it was always a nice time. I have yet to venture into going to more concentrated places alone, like a concert or sporting event. But I was excited to start attending galleries and museums alone in hopes of making myself visible to potential romantic partners. But then… COVID. So that brings me to number three.
The third recommendation was to get a connection through a friend. I shockingly like this option! The idea is that your friends know you (likes, dislikes, needs, wants) and their friends or acquaintances. If they’re intentional about the setup, they can match you with someone with whom you share common goals, values, and preferences. To me, this seems like a chance with more promise and certainty than an app or meeting someone at a bar. I think because you have the perk of someone vouching for them. I like the idea. Now, I’ve yet to be set up by someone so I don’t have experience with this option. But friends, ahem, I’m ready! Just kidding. Maybe. I don’t know.
Who knows what dating will look like in the coming months or years. Who knows when or how I’ll meet the next guy. I’m determined to continue living life, loving myself and my daughter, and at least making myself available through one of the recommendations above.
How’s dating been going for you?
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Moving forward, how am I supposed to meet “the one?” Before I could even go about wondering the answer to this question, I was given so many recommendations from friends.
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