How to Write Through A Breakup

Divorce

Jan 16

Written By

Have you ever heard of expressive writing? No? Well, let me tell you about it.

One question I get asked often is if writing my blog was cathartic for me. My answer is always no. It was painful, exposing, and sensitive. However, this could be because I started writing my blog one year after we separated.

Now, when I read my very first post, I do find it a bit cathartic. Seeing it helps me make sense of what happened, especially when time and space can dim our memories and warp our narratives. Well, that's kind of what expressive writing does.

Social psychologist, James Pennebaker, suggested in the 1980s that people use expressive writing to process traumatic events.

Expressive writing requires:
Writing for 15-20 minutes,
For 3-4 days,
About a single, traumatic event in your life.

The idea is that doing so "helps us make sense of unexpected and unimaginable events." My therapist has even had me do this for smaller, traumatic events that occurred during my divorce journey.

So, if you’re going through a breakup, separation, or divorce, give it a try! Take a few minutes, for a few days, and write about the day it all ended. It will be hard, but it will be worth it!

Then, come tell me how it went by leaving a comment below.

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